Black Friday—No Joke!

November 30, 2013

Just watched a couple of videos of people brawling at Black Friday openings and sales. I just want to ask:

What the hell is the matter with you people?

And what the hell is the matter with the stores who promote this insanity year after year?

Thanksgiving Heresy

November 25, 2013

3 good reasons to move Thanksgiving to the beginning of October: 

1. Family holidays would be farther apart, so you can spread out the fun

2. Better traveling weather, usually 

3. After Halloween the stores could roar right into Christmas mode without having to pause for Thanksgiving, and, incidentally, maybe their employees could actually get the day off!

Everyday Physics

November 24, 2013

Every time we line up for Tang Soo Do, there’s this little kid who dashes around as if he’s never done it before (he’s been there longer than I have) and always ends up homing in on the spot I’m standing in. And he looks at me with his cute little face and his big brown eyes like he’s expecting me to move...and I ignore him, and he goes and finds another spot.

It occurred to me last time what excellent physics lessons he’s learning: 1. Two pieces of matter can’t occupy the same spot, (I’m already here) and 2: A body at rest tends to remain at rest (and I ain’t movin’.).

Then I started thinking about all the physics lessons in the rest of the class. They tell us in the self-defense section about using pressure, fulcrums and centrifugal force, of course. But look at a flying side kick: Once your feet have left the ground, what keeps you going in the forward direction? What brings you back down? When you kick the bag the instructor is holding, does she rock back? Why? If not, why not? What function does the bag serve? Etc. You’ve got Laws of Thermodynamics jostling terms like vector, momentum, blah, blah, blah...

If physics teachers ever asked their students to write essays on everyday applications of physics (Do they ever?), a martial arts student would be sitting on a gold mine!

He Wants a Second Opinion

November 13, 2013

The man who bought a lot of land in Leith, N.D. in order to make the town a haven for white supremacists got the surprise of his life when his DNA test showed he was 14% black. Naturally, he’s going to be retested.

If the results remain the same, will the other people he recruited kick him out of town?

Comments From Idaho Statesman Readers That Made Me Laugh

November 5, 2013

Two items in the paper that made me laugh out loud:

1.      I swear to God, sometimes I don't think this state is actually red, just suicidal. (From an online comment by Skip Scanlin)

2.      Once upon a time, in 1990, the government seized control of the Mustang Ranch in Nevada for tax evasion. As required by law, it had to run the bordello. It did—right into the ground. The bordello closed.

If the “gummit” can’t make money running a brothel and selling whiskey, how do you pathetic liberal voters think it can manage a health care system?”  (From a Letter to the Editor by Dan Savino. Italics are mine.)  

I don’t generally agree with Mr. Savino, but the concept of being so inept that you can lose money running a brothel tickled me.