Be Progressive—Include Older Workers

July 12, 2023

 

We got a rundown of the benefits offered to women at my company. They included tons of maternity leave, folic acid supplements, counseling on post-partum depression and help with nursing—all included in the health insurance. The company also has rooms specifically for breast pumping. It really is ideal for the young and fertile. Quite progressive, in fact.

 

Older women are entitled to wellness visits and, at age 64, a bone-density test.

 

So, as a joke, I started thinking: What would be a nice benefit for us? I came up with some, and the good part is that they’ll work for men as well—so it’s like a two-fer.

 

• Instead of folic acid supplements, we could get Geritol (is that still a thing?) or Boost/Ensure
• Instead of Maternity Leave, we could get “I’m moving my parents to assisted living and I have to clean out their house” leave—or a lump sum to call 1-800-GOT-JUNK?
• Instead of post-partum or nursing counseling, we get “How to Fall Properly” classes on site, or paid time off to go to one of those programs that libraries and hospitals insist on having at 10 a.m. on weekdays.
• Instead of pumping rooms, we get close parking spaces.

 

Just a few thoughts. Chime in with your own.

 

July 30, 2023

 

I showed the list to the HR team at my office. First, they pointed out that there are more benefits for women of all ages than I listed. And THEN:

They said that they would suggest the “I’m Putting My Parents in Assisted Living” Leave to the higher-ups and see where it led. I was thrilled.