The Worst That Could Happen

January 28, 2018

A friend called to vent about some stuff that was going on in her life; 

but when she found out that I was at the store trying on jeans, her sympathies immediately veered toward me.

Restaurant Review

January 26, 2018

A restaurant review I’d really like to see:

    Good Food

    Good Service

    No Blaring Music

Now I Feel Like a Slacker

January 28, 2018

My 86-year-old aunt just told me that she goes to the gym twice a week.

I’ve never gone to a gym once!

I Missed a Few

January 24, 2018

Yesterday I read that a school shooting in Kentucky was the first school shooting with fatalities of 2018.

“How many school shootings have we had?” I asked myself. “It’s January!”

Turns out that the one in Kentucky was the 11^th of the year.

I’m not moralizing, I’m just stunned.

A Double-Standard for “You Oughtas”?

January 14, 2018

I saw 2 shows over the weekend in which men are told, “Don’t try to solve a woman’s problem; just listen to her and tell her you support her.”

It’s good advice; but, as I mentioned in the “You Oughta Club” post, women do the same thing to other women. It seems to be one thing that crosses gender lines.

It’s annoying no matter who does it; so why are we giving only men a hard time about it? Isn’t that sort of a double-standard?

Weather and Retail

January 11, 2018

Random Retail Rambling:

I don’t know about anyone else, but the January thaw often gets me into a mini spring-cleaning mood. Except that, instead of cleaning, I think of replacing old sheets and towels, and sort of spiffing up the joint.

Well, the thaw has come and gone, with nary a new towel in sight. That’s the trouble with the January thaw. It’s unpredictable. If you’re a retailer, you don’t know when to plan your white sale.

However: The next time that is a fairly sure bet for good weather is around President’s Day.

Retailers have sales on President’s Day, of course.

So if I were a retailer, I would lay the groundwork early, and encourage people to make their inventories during the thaw (whenever it might happen), with the promise of a blowout white sale/home décor sale for President’s Day. If other people are like me, except motivated, the retailers could clean up.

Who knows? It could work.

"I" vs. "Me"

January 10, 2018

OK, I’m on another grammar kick. But that’s because I just read books by two different authors who don’t know when it’s OK to use the word “me”.

As in:   Mom gave Sandy and me some of her candy.

            The principal glared at George and me when the baseball broke his window.

            Dad walked with John and me to the beach.

Somehow people think that saying “me” is always wrong. Well, it’s not. It’s only wrong when it’s used as the subject of the sentence.

You use “I” in the subject of the sentence:

“John and I went to the store.” “Mary and I wore new dresses to the dance.” “Karen and I won our chess matches.”

Here’s how Mom explained it: Take out the “Sandy and” and see which word you would use. You would say, “Mom gave me some candy.” “The principal glared at me.” “Dad walked with me to the beach.” Therefore, Dad walked with John and me to the beach.

 “I went to the store.” “I won my chess match.” Etc.

Got it?             Subject: I.       Object: Me.

Don’t make Mom and me tell you again. Because Mom and I won’t like it.

PBS Is Watching Me

January 10, 2018

With 20 seasons of “Midsomer Murders” to choose from,

How is it that PBS keeps re-running the same 12 episodes I checked out of the library?

When Is It Chewie's Turn?

January 3, 2017

As I was watching “The Last Jedi” last night I saw Chewbacca get a warm welcome, then start taking orders again—this time from the young kids!

When does he get to be an elder statesman?

I guess he’s doomed to be the eternal sidekick.

Why I Love Jennifer Crusie

November 25, 2017

…Gwen turned to look at Clea Lewis, lovely as a spring morning, if spring had been around for forty-odd years, but had taken really, really good care of itself.

(From Faking It by Jennifer Crusie)

There are writers, there are funny writers, and there’s Jennifer Crusie. In a way, she spoiled me for reading anybody else. Some of her books are standard romances, but the characters and the writing are so funny that you don’t even notice.

I picked up Getting Rid of Bradley because the setup (a guy who doesn’t show up for his divorce) reminded me of someone I know, and I got tickled. I read another book and got hooked.

Not all of her books are good, and some you have to read twice to appreciate. I didn’t think much of Agnes and the Hitman the first time, but about a year later I read it again, and it became my favorite. But if you’re a beginner, Getting Rid of Bradley and Strange Bedpersons are a great way to start.

Full disclosure: I really hate the sex scenes, but at least they’re contained to a few pages, so I can just flip right past them.

So if you’re in the mood for a laugh, or if your own writing needs a pick-me-up, try Jennifer Crusie.

“That’s not the name on your birth certificate, right?” Agnes said, not sure. The Thibault clan didn’t seem to be wound real tight; it was entirely possible that Three Wheels had a cousin legally christened Steel-Belted Radial.

(From Agnes and the Hitman)